Emotions....

talk about my life as a young mother hoping to do the best for her children in spite of the life difficulies.As a Dentist I want to share you my occupational ticklers...

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Location: mosul, Iraq

I am a 37 years old mom ,I am a mother of 3 children. I am a Dentist. I try to make every thing perfect. The life I have, the difficulties I face make me anxious.. I like to have a social life; I cannot resist my feeling of being lonely, but I don’t have good social life, & I am lonely.

Friday, November 11, 2005

That's why?

I was blamed by some of my blog readers for being hopeless, in my previous post. That made me wondering ;
How would you feel if you see ,children with painful carious teeth , abscesses,& other mouth diseases with no hope to treat that because of poverty & because the government don't provide the least medical care required for the col?
How would you feel if you see a school without electricity & the children are studying in the darkness& freezing in the classroom with no heat in very cold weather?
How would you feel if you see children in the classroom have no seats in their classrooms ?
How would you feel if you see two different classes( third & fourth , fifth & sixth)studying in one classroom at the same time ?!
How would you feel if you see every day tens or more of people from your country dying because of lack of security ?
How would you feel if you know that your blood is the cheaper among all?
How would you feel if you live in a country floating on oil , & it's people are freezing in winter?
How would you feel if your country is destructed & need rebuilding , but you see dishonesty, cheating & larceny in the authorities ?
How would you feel if you live among countries that so much cared because of the bird –flu disease & made the best procedures to protect their people & your (elected ,democratic government ) not even aware of that danger on it's people ?
How would you feel if you see all that & much more in the richest country in the world?
How would you feel if you work in a medical field & you see all the suffer & you can't do much?

Mama……..

25 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

What would I do? Well to be very honest I would leave. I would pack my bag get my family together and find a safer place to live. I understand that people have a loyalty to their country of birth, but if you are in a house that is on fire the best thing to do is get out. I can not imagine living in those conditions day after day. Leave that place for those that want to be part of that distruction and find yourself a more peacefull place to live. A place where you and your family can grow and be happy, a place where you will feel useful and your children are safe. That is what I would do.
C from Canada

11 November, 2005  
Anonymous RG said...

Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.
Mother Teresa

Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.
Mother Teresa

Do not think that love, in order to be genuine, has to be extraordinary. What we need is to love without getting tired.
Mother Teresa

Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.
Mother Teresa

Each one of them is Jesus in disguise.
Mother Teresa

Everybody today seems to be in such a terrible rush, anxious for greater developments and greater riches and so on, so that children have very little time for their parents. Parents have very little time for each other, and in the home begins the disruption of peace of the world.
Mother Teresa

Everytime you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing.
Mother Teresa

Good works are links that form a chain of love.
Mother Teresa

I am a little pencil in the hand of a writing God who is sending a love letter to the world.
Mother Teresa

I am not sure exactly what heaven will be like, but I don't know that when we die and it comes time for God to judge us, he will NOT ask, How many good things have you done in your life?, rather he will ask, How much LOVE did you put into what you did?
Mother Teresa

I do not pray for success, I ask for faithfulness.
Mother Teresa

I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.
Mother Teresa

I know God will not give me anything I can't handle. I just wish that He didn't trust me so much.
Mother Teresa

I think I'm more difficult than critical.
Mother Teresa

11 November, 2005  
Blogger Maddog said...

Mama,

In my youth I had a girlfriend who was always happy all the time. Her mother and I had a private conversation about her regarding this topic and she relayed to me that my girlfriend had scoliosis, an abnormal curvature of the spine (and very painful). When she first had the problem, she would spend her days endlessly crying and crying. So much so that her parents had a "sit down chat" with her. She was very young at the time. I will never forget their reasoning.

Her parents told her that she had the choice of two lives ahead of her...

One, where she could cry and be unhappy about her pain. And her parents would support her all the way because they understood her pain.

Two, she could "find a way" to ameliorate her pain and find a way to have a happy life. And, they would support her all the way as well.

She chose option #2. She actively began looking for ways to reduce her pain including hypnosis. And... she began looking at her life as having value again. She would wake up each day with a smile, thinking to herself that even in her horrible pain, she still had a wonderful life to live.

She became the happy person I came to know and love. Late at night she would break down and cry her eyes out from the pain she had to live with that day. I loved her so much. She was a fighter.

You, your family, and extended relatives have a different situation, we all agree. It is hard not to come home at night and cry your eyes out.

But... you, your relatives, and all Iraqis have 2 choices in your lives as well.

If you choose to cry about your troubles, everyone reading your blog will cry with you I'm sure. If you and other Iraqis acknowledge your problems and are determined to work very hard TOGETHER to make your lives better (but not perfect of course), we will be behind you all the way as well. But be very, very clear about who is causing your troubles. Do NOT fall for conspiracy theories like some of your relatives. Think very clearly about cause and effect. Who starts an action and who is there to finish it. There are many, many entities in the world who DON'T want you to be free. It is NOT the USA.

I sincerely hope that Iraqis will choose option #2 and become a "can do" country and find a way to assert your own will. When that day happens, American troops can finally come home. I hope you will find a way to do it soon.

If you wish to delete this post, I'll understand. But please read and understand my intent before doing so.

Thanks

11 November, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't live in Iraq and I don't see those things. And I cannot imagine living like that. I think every country has issues. I don't think there is a perfect place to live. And if I lived in Iraq, I would try to be a voice for those things that I know about and believe in. For instance, you work in the dental feild...I would try to reach one person at a time. Somethings are already to far. But I would start with the young and give out toothbrushes and toothpaste and dental floss, teach them how to use it and teach the importance of it. I would buy it myself and give it out. No you can't supply everyone. But it takes someone speaking out and action and presistance to make things happen. It could be something as simple as picking up the trash on your streets...you start and before you know it you have 10 people helping you. And you also have to vote. I know you feel that there is courpution in the officails...we sometimes feel the same way with out government. I pick the lesser of the two evils. And my vote may be wrong but you don't know until you give that person a chance and if you feel it was a wrong decision don't vote for them again. I know it must be hard for you to see what is going on in your country now. Was it really that much better when Sadaam was in control? Would you have been able to express yourself as you do now on the internet when Sadaam was in control. I can only continue to pray that things will get better for you and your family and your country. And I keep the faith that it will one day be safe and you'll have the things you need to have a normal healty life.

11 November, 2005  
Blogger Gypsycowgirl40 said...

Mama, I hope you find a small measure of peace amid the chaos. You are in my prayers.

11 November, 2005  
Blogger strykeraunt said...

"so today my grandpa & some of the neighbors worked together & cleaned the neighborhood (enchorial work) the neighborhood was sooo dirty . I believe if the neighbors worked together, cooperate & cleaned the neighborhood every weekend, our neighborhood will stay as clean as today."

I think you know where the quote above came from. As long as there are young girls such as her we need to keep hope alive. When I read this quote for the first time it brought tears to my eyes and filled my heart with such warmth. It is something that seems so simple but is not expressed enough.

11 November, 2005  
Blogger mama said...

thank you all , I really had bad week in the villages . but I know without faith i will have nothing then .
thankyou rg for the beutiful comment I will always remember these precious says of mother Teresa.

12 November, 2005  
Anonymous Wayne said...

Mama dear, I do not have the answer to your questions. I wish that I did. I was born and raised in poverty. I went to school where we had 8 grades in one classroom with only one teacher. That was a long time ago. I never lived in a house with electricity, water and heat until I was 18 years old and entered the army. As a child, as poor as I was, I loved for someone to pat me on the head or back and say a kind word to me. It didn't help my sickness or poverty stricken living conditions but it sure did make me feel good, just knowing someone cared. The children have never lived or experienced the good life so they do not miss the nice things that better finances would provide. I continue to pray that things will improve for you, your country and all it's people.

12 November, 2005  
Blogger olivebranch said...

I would be angry, and feel defeated- but I would never be hopeless.

Use your anger and sadness for the benefit of others- use it and direct it carefully.

There are many people ruining your life, and yes, some are from the US.

In reality- even those answering on your blog that it is not the USA are missing the point.

Even if it were the intention of the US gov't/military to help you, the economic structure of the world - capitalism, America's ideology- is a main cause in all of this suffering...

Oneday we will use capitalisms successes to erase its fallings- but that day is in the future, and will require a lot of work to get there.

<3 u & sunshine.

be well

<3 [olivebranch]

13 November, 2005  
Anonymous JC said...

Mama,

It is impossible for those us now living in peace and safety to imagine what your life is truly like, and to give you advice. I don't think, honestly, that I would have the courage to stay in Iraq, with children, as things are now. I do believe that, someday, Iraq will be democratic and peaceful...but it looks like that is a long, long, way off in the future.

I believe that things are especially hard for you... because you are a compassionate person... and you see misery and fear all around you. I can tell that you hurt not only for your own family, but for all of those who suffer.

You are still in Iraq, trying to help, trying to cope...how can we expect any more of you?

I would feel just as you do.

You and the other Iraqi bloggers provide the only window we, on the outside, have to see what is really going on in Iraq. So you are doing something very valuable.

We do have the ability to put some pressure on our political leaders right now...so please tell us what we can do for you, and we will do our best!

By the way, I loved reading about Maddog's wonderful girlfriend, but do not agree with him that the U.S. government is necessarily acting in the best interest of the Iraqi people. I do not believe they have ever been honest about all of the reasons for this war, and the people of Iraq are not their priority now.

Judy, (U.S.)

15 November, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree that I probably would feel just like you. I would be terribly sad and hopeless. The stress of living in Iraq would make me mentally and physically ill--I am certain of it.

What America wants for Iraq is precisely what America has given to other countries. After World War II, Europe was shattered. But with U.S. help, Europe is a remarkable success now. South Korean is perhaps the best example. An impoverished country has turned into a world-class economic power and the people are very prosperous and have very good health and life expectancy. All because the USA defended freedom and democracy--and continues to provide a shield of safety for the Koreans. We did the same with the Japanese. Great country. We are counting on you Iraqis to be our next partnership for success, peace, prosperity, freedom, rule of law, etc. Please don't go the way of the Vietnamese or the Cubans or the Venezuelans or the North Koreans... You will not be happy with the result.

15 November, 2005  
Blogger On the warpath said...

Mama: I share your sense of frustration, but on a lesser level, since I watch it from afar. Your children are your best hope in this world. May you and they safe safe through this troubled time.
Sharon Jumper

15 November, 2005  
Blogger Kim said...

I can't imagine how it feels for you Mama. Continue to use this blog to vent your feelings. You obviously are good at hiding your negative feelings from Sunshine. She often sounds so optimistic. But that is what we must do as mothers for our children. Try to provide the best possible enviornment for them to grow as responisble adults. You are doign a good job Mama in spite of the tribulation you must be feeling. Are you able to talk with your husband or family about how you feel? I wonder if you are suffering from some depression as well. That might be something to consider?
I continue to pray for your family and the people of your country.
Kim

17 November, 2005  
Blogger mama said...

Kim you are absolutely right I used to hide my fears & feelings from my children . I always try to show them the bright side of every thing in our life.
I am depressed ,& I do use medication for depression.
I always try to hide my inside from every one ,I have my own separate world .I only be overt when I am in Baghdad between my family & friends ,only among them I can be who I am. All that because I don’t want to affect on my children's fostering ,I am proud to have optimistic , open minded ,happy children in spite of the difficulties we face in our life . They are stuck inside the house we rarely go out , but they know how to have fun , & what to do in their spare time.

18 November, 2005  
Blogger Kim said...

I'm so glad that you do take medication for your depression and that it is available to you. I am a nurse and a proponent for antidepressants. They can help you live from day to day in your job and being the awesome mom that you are to your children. I know it doesn't change the surroundings but it does help you cope. Keep sharing, that is good medicine too!

19 November, 2005  
Blogger thepatriot15 said...

Mama;
I talked to a U.S. soldier the other day. Face to face. He is a sniper in the Army, and has seen some pretty nasty stuff in Iraq. He has seen the worst of it. And he believes in Iraq; that is why he went back, to fight for ours and YOUR freedom. He is willing to die for you; and for you to say you don't believe in him, or your own country, is a big slap in the face. You may not feel optimistic about Iraq's future, but we in America are, and many people who were oppressed under Saddam are. You can leave your home in Iraq as some people here have suggested, but you would only be running away from a wonderful country that is in it's first rebuilding stages. No, I have not seen war; and that it because of our military that has protected me. But I know that it will get better, if the Iraqi people are willing to work hard and stick to the work it takes to rebuild a country.

Hang in there; America IS supporting you.

21 November, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mama,

I hope you didn't think that I was trying to say you don't have a right to feel hopeless or that you were somehow wrong for feeling that way. Hopelessness is an entirely understandable emotion given the current situation you are in. I think all of us were just trying to give you positive encouragement to help you keep looking ahead for a brighter day. Every one of us has things in our lives that could drag us down into despair and depression if we focused on them too much. We all make it through by looking for the bright spots in our lives (however small they may be for some of us) and keeping our hope that things will be better in the future.

Also, I had a question...Najma's blog says that your daughter's blog has been hijacked? What does that mean? Did I miss something and it is back to normal now?

22 November, 2005  
Anonymous jd said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

22 November, 2005  
Anonymous Hank said...

jd, I believe that you are out of order.

I would love to see more Iraqi people take a stand against the terrorists but I can also understand the fear that mothers are going through.

22 November, 2005  
Blogger SKiZM said...

yes, yes. America is the great hero of the world. Except in places like Germany and South Korea, where the citizens hate the US military bases which have occupied their countries for half a century. There are riots and demonstrations in these countries all the time, and American citizens are routinely attacked.
I know, because I used to live there.
Bless you, Mama, for your strength and courage. Please continue enlightnening us with your honesty.

25 November, 2005  
Blogger clair said...

I could never imagine your life I have a very beutiful and peaceful life and want for nothing but I still find time to complain and wish for more. You certainly have lots of advice. Some good and some could be better. I wish you peace and courage in your life. God must feel you are indeed a very stong person. I wish I was as strong as you and as beutiful as Sunshine. Mother Teresa and Mad Dog have the best advise Im glad you did not deleat his post.

19 December, 2005  
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22 December, 2005  
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