Emotions....

talk about my life as a young mother hoping to do the best for her children in spite of the life difficulies.As a Dentist I want to share you my occupational ticklers...

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Location: mosul, Iraq

I am a 37 years old mom ,I am a mother of 3 children. I am a Dentist. I try to make every thing perfect. The life I have, the difficulties I face make me anxious.. I like to have a social life; I cannot resist my feeling of being lonely, but I don’t have good social life, & I am lonely.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

I need some one to listen attentively






Hi
After being ill for about two weeks, I feel nervous all the time as I stopped taking antidepressant medications after withdrawal schedule ,I like to laugh and tell jokes specially at work but in fact I feel very much angry ,anxious and deeply sad. I feel like I want to shout ,scream so loudly till I make every one pay attention .probably I am getting crazy, or I had enough from being patient and the wise person that live for every one else except my self.
I spent the first 9 days in bed ,in the worse condition ,feeling faintly, then I started to spend hours playing music on my key board and some time knitting macramé, music helped me a lot to avoid the nausea discomfort, and to kill the time…
Mama

21 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hear you.

XOXO

24 November, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey mama
we r all listening, and happy to c ur posts again, and the jokes and laughs are normal behaviours especially in our mood depressing situation, we just need every chance to laugh (and for me i wouldnt miss any ).and really i was(& am) delightful to c u like this. its better than getting depressed with headaches and nuasea.i think its enough to be a patient with medications in mouth.
keep laughing and cheerful in ur life.
baghdadentist

24 November, 2007  
Blogger Ripama said...

Mama,

It's difficult for me to respond since I'm not familiar with that type of affliction. Also, we are worlds apart so I can't even imagine the anxieties you experience.

Pardon my ignorance, but perhaps you can find others in your location who share a similar affliction and perhaps you can support each other.

In any case, I just want you to know that I'm praying for your recovery

24 November, 2007  
Anonymous Roy said...

Happy to hear that you feel better and that you took off work. Rest from all of the stress will help. I listen to music most of the day and it helps me deal with depression. You can't help other people if you don't take care of yourself first.

24 November, 2007  
Anonymous Wayne said...

Eni Mama, I feel so sorry for you and your illness. I hope that you can recover very soon. I am sure that you are aware that it will take a few weeks to recover from the antidepression medications. You will be nervous and feel like screeming. I hope you recover soon.

I have read that conditions have improved greatly in Baghdad. Would it be possible for you to go visit your mother and father for a week or two? I think that would be a relief for you.

All the terrible things that are happening in Mosul would cause most young women of your age to be extremely nervous.

I will pray and ask our God to protect you and your family and help you to get better soon.

We do care for you and your family.

24 November, 2007  
Blogger Laura said...

Dear friend: I practice psychology (not psychiatry) in the United States. I hope your doctor explained to you that as you go off anti depressants you may find you have a lot of uncomfortable emotional experiences, mood swings, irritability, tearfulness, anxiety, poor sleep, aches and pains. I hope these are abating. Sometimes meditation, prayer or even simply taking ten minutes to do nothing but breathe deeply and slowly can help ease your mood and anxiety. You may also find it helpful to eat foods rich in tryptophan (crackers, rice, beans, bananas, turkey, milk) if at all possible. Foods that may make other people sleepy (but not you) may be just what you need, if you have low serotonin. Please know people care. You're not crazy, you're stressed and anxious. Sending you my best thoughts. (feel free to email me if you wish!)

25 November, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What music do you play on the piano?

25 November, 2007  
Anonymous steen said...

Mama,
Good to see you doing something! Depression is a serious illness. Difficult to recover when you living in a war zone. Hope your husband is helping! I feel so sorry for you.
Heh! You have slim, pretty hands, long fingers. Perfect for a dentist! My dentist's hands are big - scares me!
Try to keep calm. Don't worry about tomorrow. Find some enjoyment for today.
Please use a new name! I don't like calling you Mama!

26 November, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

when the well is dry one cannot do anything but replenish from inside.

However, at the same time extreme action is required because if things continue as is your body will shut down altogether.
Ludicrous as it may sound, contact the US embassy and tell them due to circumstances beyond your control you must declare yourself a casualty/ or prisoner of war and ask what they can do for you under the Geneva Treaty to help.

Second, contact CNN, NY Times, any large media organization and ask them the same question. Get all of them to help you find answers as you are working under front line conditions as a soldier gamely tending and ministering to other casualties and prisoners of war.

Love yourself and hold dear others.

GET MAD AS HELL!

I apologize if this all seems banal, but all I could do is hopefully show you I listened.

And I am not joking about my suggestions. After all, THIS IS WAR!

26 November, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mama, I am so glad to hear you are doing better. We are all eagerly listening to you. As I said in my post to Sunshine, there is a light. Things are getting better all over Iraq as Iraqi's are more and more determined not to let the terrorists gain ground. Have faith Mama.

26 November, 2007  
Blogger mama said...

hi
I am glad that I got many listeners ,even without I have to scream loud!!!!
About the type of music I play, I can play what I hear, but I can't read the music notes.
,I am fond of some country songs as well as some Arabic songs. I play many songs specially the old songs ,like strangers in the night ,and love story. I often listen to Whitney Houston , her song" greatest love of all" is brilliant , I like frank Sinatra . Celin Dion 's song "I am a live" is one of my favorite ,Julio has amazing style in singing .Those are my best singers and I try to play the music of their songs….I wrote about my favorite songs and singers to give you an idea about the Iraqi women taste .
please keep listening , and thank you all for your support.
Mama

27 November, 2007  
Blogger John said...

Dear Sunshine's Mom,
I will be praying for you. I hope you will feel better soon. In my opinion, people who feel like they're going crazy are rational -- it is the crazy ones who think that everybody ELSE is crazy and they themselves are right.

27 November, 2007  
Blogger dancewater said...

Mama,
I hope you keep feeling better and better and I hope the situation in your town improves soon.

I hope all this ugliness is over soon.

30 November, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"angry ,anxious and deeply sad"

Mamma, those are emotions that tell you "You Are ALIVE". Goodness, look at the hell you are living in. Thank God you can still FEEL! I don't understand why you don't get your family out of that situation. Iraq is not the only place on Earth. Life is more important than a home, a job, a country. I will sponser your family. Thousand of other people will too. Why do you sacrifice your soul, your childrens' souls, for a building, a peice of land, a tradition? Save your family and yourself before it's too late!!!

30 November, 2007  
Anonymous heyduke said...

There is a song lyric that says "If I wasn't crazy I would go insane". I think there is a lot of truth in that.

01 December, 2007  
Anonymous steen said...

mama
Do you like only American singers / songs?

02 December, 2007  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Howdy Mama !! Been a big fan of Sunshine's blog for quite awhile now. We all think the world of her. I'm adding you to my blog list. Can't believe I'm calling somebody "Mama" that's so much younger than myself (I helped invent dirt ya know):O !! Because of Sunshine, I kind of feel like I've come to know your family. You better know you have friends out here! I hope you get to feeling better!!!! Grins and hugs to y'all!! Solo

02 December, 2007  
Anonymous gigi said...

I am a psychiatric nurse in the US in a busy psychiatric emergency room. It sounds like what you are going through is normal. Your brain chemistry is undergoing changes from coming off the medication. Also, you are living under military occupation which is undoubtedly very stressful. If you are better physically you should probably go back on medication slowly increasing the dose over a week or two. I read your profile about being lonely, but remember, you are not alone. Many people are here for you and feel your plight. I want to see Americans of conscience get together and insist on an end to this occupation and to do whatever we can to reduce the stress so you can sleep without medication.

08 December, 2007  
Blogger mama said...

thank you gigi ,i am going through a tough time ...

09 December, 2007  
Blogger MUSER said...

Dearest Mama,
How I wish I could in some way lesson your pain and suffering.
Even though I've never been in a situation like yours, I can very well imagine what you are going through since I'm a mother too.
My family and I will pray for you and your family everyday.I hope God showers his mercy on all of you and peace is restored in your country at the earliest.God bless.
ps-I adored Sunshine's blog. She is one smart, brave girl.

12 January, 2008  
Blogger saminkie said...

dear young mama, when I read this post I really felt that it was wrong we didn't met, cause i like to hear your music playing and want you to hear mine, i play the aud (3ud), we would be a good group. Am really happy am at least noticed your blog, i will always read it, keep posting....

11 February, 2008  

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